Love is a powerful thing it will make you do things you just won't believe. i have done things i refuse to talk about all for one person i'm still putting my life on hold in the hopes that things will change but it just seems like it's getting worse.! the numorous tears i have held back are becoming unbarable.! i trimble just thinking of what i feel like is going to end up happening.! this is torture and i'm putting myself through it.! my best advice to you guys would be to never be the kind of person that can't let go. cause i wish i could but what keeps me holding on.? the answer is.! hope. and the fact that he still shows interest in me but it's killing me slowly i don't tell anyone but it gets worse and worse everyday.... ::((

So yesterday was an interesting day i know i haven't been here in a while but there have just been so much going on  in my life i just don't know where to begin.! i promise to all of my followers i will start postingh more.! i just need to get myself tiogether because i'm sure you guys don't want to hear me cry, rant, and rave all day on wht is supposed to be letting you guys in on the good part of my life. it's extremely early in the morning rightnow but this is a normal thing for me.! well guys i will say this much i don't where my love life is going but it is causing me to rip my hair out.! but i have a feeling that all in good time things will get better i just hope this doen's blow up in anybodies face.! love is a powerful thing and i am willing to do most anything for this person.! no matter what the extent i don't know what happens from here because i'm not the only one in this thing because he has been winking at me all day but at the same time he has been doing it to someone else.! i just don't know.! i haven't really been feeling too good but ii have been masking it all with laughter and conversation.! i just pray for this to not go as it is playing out in my head because if so i think i'm going to be very hurt and i may lose a very near and dear friend and ex boyfriend of nin years.! i just don't know well time for me to go guys.! keep in touch :(((((